WWF/WWE House Shows Compared – 1996 & 2013

WWE has just launched their latest European tour.  For the first time in a long time, I have no interest in getting tickets for when they come to London.  It just doesn’t seem worth the money, even if the London crowds for Raw and Smackdown might give Fandango a warm welcome.  Of course, as discussed earlier, there is no guarantee that would happen.

But!  Was this always the case?  Let’s check out a WWE house show line up from 1996, to see if back in the early days of the Monday Night Wars there were house shows worth checking out…

27 January 1996, from State College, PA, in front of 7,860 fans:

Owen Hart v Hakushi

Okay, yes, definitely a strong opening match.  Hakushi as a babyface was something of a misnomer in WWE but there’s no denying he was an exciting wrestler for the promotion in that period.  Owen was the textbook definition of opening match heel, which is in no way meant to be a slight on him.  Thumbs up!  1-0.

Ahmed Johnson v Jeff Jarrett

Ehhhh… no, thanks all the same.  Rarely has a person gone so far with so little in wrestling as Jarrett.  Johnson was a prototype Bobby Lashley, someone brought in as a powerhouse, given a huge early push and then flamed out fairly quickly and faded into obscurity.  And a little pimping on the side.  I can imagine this being an uneventful, inoffensive, bland encounter, the wrestling equivalent of going to the post office.  1-1.

The Ringmaster v Henry Godwinn

Yes, THE RINGMASTER.  Nothing good could come from such a gimmick, I swear.  Part of me really wants to check out this match in order to scratch my historical curiosity.  Steve Austin, with a little bit of hair and no personality, taking on a pig farmer?  What’s not to love?  2-1.

Savio Vega v Goldust (Intercontinental Title Match)

Say what you will about the match quality thus far, at least everybody on this card has a readily identifiable personality.  There were no Alex Rileys here.  There was a sexual deviant and a happy-go-lucky Puerto Rican street urchin.  That’ll do, I guess, although I’ve little to no interest in seeing either man fight.  Goldust works best played for comedy and Vega was essentially a 16-bit game in a 64-bit world.  2-2.

Tatanka & Isaac Yankem v Fatu & Bob Holly

See what I mean?  Now we have a Native American who is disillusioned and sold himself to a white millionaire (and people think Zeb Coulter is a racy racial character), teaming up with a giant evil dentist.  Their opponents: a happy-go-lucky Samoan street urchin and a chirpy race car driver with a mullet.  That description alone makes me want to drop everything, invent a time machine, scalp a front row ticket and just start throwing money at the ring.  3-2.

Bret Hart v Diesel (WWE Championship Cage Match)

Back in the day, the actual main event was held at the mid-point of the show.  This was for a variety of reasons – to maximise merchandise sales during intermission, to allow families to get home early, to allow the stars to get to other events that night, tradition – but still strikes me as a bit odd.  Bret and Diesel had some tremendous matches in this period, in particular the surprisingly intense Survivor Series 1995 match a few months earlier when Bret regained the title.  A lot of internet fans appear to have grown weary of Bret over the years but there is no denying he was a fabulous worker.  Who else, outside of the Clique, had a series of great matches with Kevin Nash?  Exactly.  4-2.

Smoking Gunns v Bodydonnas (Tag Team Titles Match)

I literally have no recollection of what happened with the Tag Team Titles at this period.  I remember a huge pop for the Headshrinkers winning them on Raw in 1994.  I remember the general confusion at the New Age Outlaws winning them in 1997.  Everything in the middle is a bit of a blur.  And probably involves Sunny at the height of her powers, which no doubt explains my distracted state of mind.  Enjoy a nice quiet video that proves my point:

Don’t do crack, kids.

Ahem.  Rating this match on the assumption that Sunny would not be there, well, it’s a no.  4-3.

Shawn Michaels v Hunter Hearst Helmsley

This would have been a very strange match for a kid like me to see back then.  Michaels was off on a huge main event babyface push to fulfilling his notorious “boyhood dream” a month after this show.  Helmsley was nothing about nothing, just another undercard geek with a zany gimmick – and not even an amusing one at that.  If you knew nothing about their backstage friendship, any interaction between these two characters on-camera would have been quite odd.  Like John Cena all of a sudden working with a Drew McIntyre.  No doubt that these two would have put forth a great effort to help one another out, though, so we’ll add this to the historical curiosity pile.  5-3.

The Undertaker v Yokozuna

Christ, no.  We’re still a few weeks away from Mankind arriving and finally waking up Undertaker.  Yokozuna presumably weighed three thousand pounds of cheese and counting by this stage.  It would have given me a good solid reason to leave early and beat traffic but that is the sole redeeming feature here.  5-4.

That is a slightly above average winning percentage of 56% matches that would be worth my time.  We can bump that up to 67% if I would be within tickling distance of Sunny ’96 (especially if I had no real plans to ever return to the arena).

Compare this to a recent WWE house show on 30 March 2013 at Atlantic City, NJ, in front of 7,700 fans:

Kaitlyn v Tamina Snuka (who could possibly be interested?  0-1)

Antonio Cesaro v R-Truth (Cesaro has multiple upsides but not enough to save this… 0-2)

Alberto Del Rio v Wade Barrett (no characters, no conflict, no interest… 0-3)

Alberto Del Rio, Chris Jericho & The Miz v Wade Barrett, Jack Swagger & Fandango (slight interest here courtesy of Jericho’s involvement… 1-3)

Big Show v 3 Man Band (need I say more?  1-4)

Mark Henry v Ryback (an over-the-top-rope challenge, apparently, since we can’t say battle royal in 2013… slightly scary that Mark Henry was on the roster even back in 1996… 1-5)

John Cena, Randy Orton & Sheamus v The Shield (okay, they got me there, 2-5)

That’s a far lower interest level of 29%.  And at far higher ticket prices too!

It all comes down to characters, in the end.  1996 had numerous issues for the then-WWF, of course, yet at least the wrestlers had clear personalities.  This made it easier to become immersed in their matches, to root for the good guys and hope the bad guys got their comeuppance.  It made for a fun atmosphere at the live event.

By contrast, these days, there is an ever-present sense of going through the motions.  Whereas Owen Hart knew every cheap little trick in the book to get a crowd to boo him, a guy like Wade Barrett is practically reduced to using the old ‘BOO THIS GUY’ sign from the WCW theme park shows.  The reigning champion in 1996, Bret Hart, would fight tooth and nail to survive against his giant enemy.  Cena, on the other hand, would no doubt goof around endlessly with his tag partners here and survive his latest visit to Looney Tunes Land.  So, for all the crap mid-90s WWE got, was it really any more cartoon-ish than what happens today?